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The Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine: Core Wounds and Ways to Heal

Updated: Oct 26


When I first embarked on my healing journey, I found myself in a difficult place, grappling with the end of one of my first serious relationships. During this time, I turned to isolation as a means of self-protection, keeping my inner struggles hidden behind a facade of strength while silently imploding within.


It wasn't until I began therapy that I discovered one of my fears: showing vulnerability. However, little did I know that this behavior stemmed from deep-seated wounds in my divine masculine energy.


As I dove deeper into my healing journey, I came across the concept of the divine masculine and divine feminine energies, which allowed me to better understand our energetic differences and how to embrace and honor them to find balance.


In this post, I dive deeper into the distinctions between the divine masculine and divine feminine, highlight core wounds associated with each, and share guidance on how to heal and find harmony within.


Understanding the Divine Masculine and Divine Feminine

Contrary to popular belief, the divine masculine and divine feminine are not limited to biological sex. Instead, they represent specific energetic qualities inherent in all individuals that transcend gender identity and physical appearances.

The Divine Masculine embodies attributes like action, strength, and logic. It thrives on courage, leadership, and assertiveness, seeking to build, protect, and provide structure. The Divine Feminine is characterized by receptivity and nurturing qualities. It encompasses empathy, compassion, and emotional depth, serving as the energy of creation, intuition, and interconnectedness.

While distinct, these energies are complementary and necessary for our wholeness. For example, an awakened divine feminine is empowered by a strong inner masculine that provides support and direction, while an awakened divine masculine is balanced by a nurturing inner feminine that encourages empathy and collaboration.


Identifying Core Wounds

Often our divine energies are wounded by societal expectations, familial pressures, or past experiences, leading to deep-seated wounds that hinder our growth. However, to live in the highest vibration and most harmonious state of these energies, it's important to first identify and call out our core wounds when they show up in our day-to-day. Here are some common wounds associated with each energy type.


Divine Masculine Wounds

  1. Hyper-Competitiveness: Feeling the need to constantly compete with others to prove your worth or superiority, leading to a sense of insecurity and a lack of collaboration.

  2. Workaholism:  Obsessive focus on work as a means of escape from underlying emotional issues, resulting in neglect of personal relationships and well-being.

  3. External Validation: Seeking approval from external sources such as achievements, status, or material possessions, rather than finding validation from within.

  4. Control Issues: Looking to exert control over situations, people, or outcomes out of fear of uncertainty or vulnerability, resulting in rigidity and resistance to change.

  5. Dominance and Aggression: Using dominance, aggression, or intimidation to assert power and control over others, often stemming from deep-seated insecurities and fears of inadequacy.

  6. Emotional Shutdown: Shutting down or numbing emotions as a coping mechanism to avoid pain or discomfort, leading to emotional unavailability in relationships.

  7. Isolation: Withdrawing from social connections and intimacy as a way to protect yourself from potential hurt or rejection, resulting in loneliness and feelings of alienation.

  8. Avoidance of Vulnerability: Avoiding situations or conversations that require vulnerability or emotional openness, fearing that it will lead to weakness or loss of control.

  9. Inability to Express Needs: Difficulty identifying and communicating personal needs and boundaries, leading to frustration and resentment in relationships.


Divine Feminine Wounds

  1. People-Pleasing/Self-Sacrifice: Constantly prioritizing the needs and desires of others over your own, often out of a sense of duty or obligation, leading to burnout and resentment.

  2. Perfectionism: Striving for unrealistic standards of perfection in appearance, behavior, or achievements, leading to chronic stress, anxiety, and self-criticism.

  3. Dependency: Relying excessively on others for validation, support, or decision-making, rather than cultivating self-reliance and inner strength.

  4. Victim Mentality: Viewing yourself as powerless or at the mercy of external circumstances, leading to a sense of helplessness and a lack of agency in your life.

  5. Passivity: Allowing life to happen passively without taking proactive steps to pursue goals or assert boundaries, leading to feelings of stagnation and unfulfillment.

  6. Emotional Manipulation: Using emotions or perceived vulnerability as a means to control or manipulate others' behaviors or responses, often stemming from a fear of abandonment or rejection.

  7. Self-Devaluation: Internalizing negative beliefs about your worth or capabilities, leading to feelings of inadequacy, unworthiness, or imposter syndrome.

  8. Emotional Overwhelm: Drowning in your emotions and unable to regulate or express them effectively, leading to mood swings, volatility, and interpersonal conflict.

  9. Enabling: Allowing unhealthy behaviors or dynamics in relationships by avoiding confrontation or enabling others' destructive patterns, often stemming from a fear of conflict or rejection.


Healing Core Wounds

Once you can begin to identify your core wounds, next turn your attention to healing them. With patience, self-awareness, self-compassion, and intentional growth, you can begin to heal your core wounds, leading to greater authenticity and fulfillment in your life. Here are a few suggestions to get you started.


Divine Masculine

  • Self-Awareness: Explore your beliefs, values, and actions related to your masculine traits. Get started with this journaling prompt:"Describe your relationship with vulnerability. How comfortable are you with expressing your emotions and asking for support? Are there any fears or insecurities associated with being vulnerable?"

  • Self-Compassion: Release self-judgment and resentment towards yourself for past mistakes or perceived shortcomings. Treat yourself with the same kindness and forgiveness you would offer a loved one. Here's a forgiveness meditation to try.

  • Intentional Growth: Attend workshops or seminars focused on emotional intelligence, and interpersonal relationships. Engage in activities that promote personal growth and self-awareness. Here's a book I've enjoyed focused on communicating with empathy.


Divine Feminine

  • Self-Awareness: Explore the shadow aspects of your feminine energy by acknowledging and integrating repressed or denied emotions and traits. Embrace all facets of your femininity with curiosity and acceptance. Get started with this journaling prompt: "Write about a time when you've avoided taking action or asserting your boundaries. What fears or beliefs hold you back from speaking up or pursuing your goals? How can you cultivate a greater sense of empowerment and assertiveness?"

  • Self-Compassion: Establish self-care practices that nurture your feminine energy, such as taking baths, spending time in nature, or practicing yoga. Treat yourself with kindness and gentleness. Check out this 28-day self-love calendar for ideas.

  • Intentional Growth: Seek out workshops or programs focused on feminine leadership principles and skills. Develop your leadership abilities while honoring your feminine qualities of intuition, empathy, and collaboration. Here's one of my favorite courses.


Balancing the divine masculine and divine feminine within yourself is a profound journey of healing and integration. It involves honoring the inherent qualities of each energy without judgement while honoring the process of growth and self-discovery within.


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